What is next?
So you’ve been on yachts for the past few years, and each year you think, well…. I’ll just put in another year, it will be fine. Until one day you cannot handle it anymore, that Chief/head of department is just on at you again, the deckhand just won’t put their phone away, or your cabin mate has stepped over the line one too many times.
But, when you start to consider leaving, you just don’t know where to begin.
You’ve seen Stewardess’s leave the industry to go and work in another land based ‘personal villa management role’, to then return to yachting, because it didn’t work out, or they hated it, or they ran out of money.
This happens far too often.
People look for jobs that resemble their current job outside of yachting. However, often then return because the job didn’t provide the money, the friendships, the lifestyle or the travel.
Unfortunately for many of us, this looming factor of what to do next keeps us holding onto something we don’t necessarily want, but we don’t know what to do otherwise.
My Story
For me this happened, more than once.
I wanted to leave because things hadn’t been good for a while, but the fear of the unknown or how I could replicate my skills after yachting was too overwhelming.
Often they say choice is freedom. But at the same time, choice can be something that holds us back from doing anything at all, and keeps us stuck in a bad place for too long.
I developed anxiety when it came to thinking about what to do next, to the point I would completely shut down thinking about it all together.
The fear was too much.
I couldn’t sleep properly at night. I became more frustrated and had a negative outlook on things that had never impacted me before (and I started complaining, which is something that I had always disliked when others did it). I found myself turning out to be one of those people I disliked.
Unfortunately when this all starts happening, it becomes harder to start seeing clarity or the many opportunities that are in front of you. For me, instead I saw the fear of failure and not being able to succeed in anything else I tried. My positivity was diminishing and fading, quickly.
I sought out help from many places, but truthfully didn’t know where to look. I spoke to counsellors, I spoke to career coaches, and none were able to understand what I even meant when I said 'I was a Bosun on a Yacht’.
Then finally I found a Coach. She truly helped me out of a bad place. I was able to speak to her with honesty and openness. I put all my trust in her and she helped me to look at what I truly valued and found important.
I had never done any ‘internal work’ before. I thought I knew myself, but actually it turns out when I started doing some work on myself, I discovered a whole lot more.
I discovered that I really enjoyed helping, supporting and motivating people. But to be honest, it wasn’t the first thing I came up with. I found that there were so many things I enjoyed, and valued, and that had just never been obvious to me before.
When we started working together I found I was able to open up to her and find out more about myself than I ever knew. Well it was just a start anyway.
Through this process I also discovered that I truly wanted to help people through this process of finding out about others enjoy, are good at, and want in their lives, and also what they don’t want in their lives. This is what led me into the world of coaching and helping people go through what can be a pretty big life event and change in their lives. Having gone through it myself, I know we are all different and everyones story will be different, but I am the support to help people get to the other side.
WHAT DOES THIS ALL MEAN?
After learning an amazing coaching process which takes people through 3 phases - Discovery, Exploration and then Planning, I have now adapted this into my own unique take and tailored this for yacht crew particularly.
First you Discover your own strengths, skills, motivators and things that you want in your life.
Then you Explore all the ideas you’ve ever found interesting in a career, an interest or an idea, and we extract what it is you like about these. And then start researching further into this. We come out with some new ideas and direction.
Finally, we look at putting it all into a Plan, to get you from where you are now, to your future new goal.
Things you can do to get started
Take a step back from it all.
If you can do something mediative (go for a walk, do a mediation technique, learn to breath https://drchatterjee.com/5-breathing-techniques-help-reduce-stress/ - this is a selection of different breathing techniques you can try to help you de-stress)
Know that it’s ok to be in this place, and you will not be stuck in this place forever.
Start jotting down things that you enjoy. These can be interests or activities, jobs or careers, people or places. Just anything that makes you happy. Then try see if there is anyway you can incorporate these into your life.
Try and list (either writing down or to start with just thinking about) - 3 things that you are grateful for or 3 things that have gone well for you today. Do this each day if you can. It will start to make your brain realise that there are good things happening for you.
Remove yourself from negativity. Sometimes it can be pretty hard on the boat when people start getting negative. But if you are able to remove yourself from these occasions, it will really start to help.
Look into different career options you’ve ever had an interest in - do a bit of personal research into these, see if theres anyone you can speak to who is in this industry, or read articles within the industry.
Talk to someone outside of your work environment. It is often important for us to remember that there is a wide world outside of yachting, and sometimes just speaking to others - about things they might think you are already good at, or they may have connections with other people in an industry outside of your own.
Know you’re not on your own. There are many other people who have been through what you’re going through and can speak about this with you.
Of course, send me a message and get in touch. I am hear to listen if you just need someone to voice your situation to.
You can email - info@apetchellcoaching.com
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Join my facebook group for more info - Yachting Exit Strategy Group
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*Send me a message what ever way you like, and we can chat and gain some clarity on what it is you need right now. The first call is free and will provide you value and support.
